Funny Things Kids Say...

My kids are always saying the funniest things, and the last couple of days are not an exception. However, as a disclaimer, the things they say are always more funny in person. But, I will post them for those who know my kids well. You will get a kick out of them.

1. Like many parents, Wendy and I are committed to teaching our children how to work and clean. Well, one of Jared's "jobs" is to make sure our little fridge (we have this fridge for drinks) is full of water bottles at all times. In order to teach responsibility and accountability, we taught him that if he doesn't do his job, the rest of us won't have cold water to drink. We explain that it is important to everyone that he do his job--just like a business, when one person fails to perform, others are also penalized.

So, the other night we were getting ready to eat dinner. I went to the little fridge to get some water for everyone, and there were only a couple of bottles left in the fridge.

I said to Jared, "We're almost out of water, so after dinner you need to do your job." To which he replied, "Dad, I'm out of business now."

I guess he really does understand what happens when people don't do their jobs!!

2. Steve and Marissa stopped in Dallas on their way to Houston. One morning Jared was snooping through their stuff and found some Starbursts. Marissa gave Jared a couple of them and he came and showed Rowan and me. I asked Jared if he would give one to Rowan, to which Rowan jumped up with excitement. Jared began unwrapping the candy and acted like he was going to put it in his mouth. Little Rowan, who is a late bloomer in terms of speech, began begging Jared -

"PWEASE, PWEASE, PWEASE, PWEASE, JAWWED, PWEASE, PWEASE..."

Growing tired of the taunts, I said, "Come on, Jared." Rowan, seeing another avenue then said, "Yeah, come on dude!"

This is hilarious to those who know little Rowan, because of the way he talks. He knows what he is saying, but sometimes the rest of us don't. Maybe candy is the key to getting clear phonics.

3. Every Friday one of the parents of Jared's preschool class comes to the school to read to the class. Today was Wendy's turn, but she is feeling sick with mastitis (infection of the breast in breastfeeding mothers). So, when I dropped Jared off at school, I told the teacher that Wendy wasn't feeling well, but would try to make it. Well, she wasn't able to make it and when picking Jared up from pre-school, his teacher wanted to speak to me away from the kids.

She said, "I want to tell you something funny. The kids were asking who was going to read to them today, and I told them that Jared's mom was going to try to make it but she may not be able to. When one of the kids asked why not, Jared blurted out, 'because my mommy's boob hurts really bad.'"

KIDS!!!