Wednesday, March 21, 2007

Human Genome Discovery


They finally found it. They have confirmed the suspicions of millions of men. The most brilliant geneticists of our day have finally found a female gene that many men have suspected existed. With over 3 billion subunits to search, it is no wonder they had such a hard time finding it. They have nicknamed it the "Lights Out" gene.

How many of you husbands find yourselves constantly walking around the house turning off lights! There is nothing "better" than walking upstairs to a plethora of rooms that haven't seen the breath of life for hours and seeing EVERY light switched on. To make things more confusing, when this happens during the daytime, all the blinds are open simultaneously. Anyhow, you then walk through the house turning lights off only to find that an hour later this process needs repeating. Of course, she blame the kids, but you then remember the time when the two of you didn't have kids. You were turning lights off then as well. In addition, the same scientists found the "Lights Out Gene" right next to the "Blame the Kids Gene." So, there is now scientific evidence to reject the old "kids did it" excuse.

I suppose it is possible that men have a similar gene that predisposes us to want the lights off. It is probably right next to the gene of practicality called the "I Don't Like to See Our Money Going Down the Drain" gene.

In both cases, men and women can now understand that, since it is part of our genetic make up, we just can't help it. Women leave lights on; men turn them off.

What do you think of this new discovery? Are there any other genes you suspect exists that you would like for the scientists to validate?

14 comments:

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Ben said...

Since this was a scientific study, I had to remove Wendy's non-scientific observation.

Steve said...

Did these geneticists find anything on the "ask my husband his opinion and argue with him" gene? I find that most if not all women possess this gene. Yes, I am confident that women are biologically equipped to ask their husband his opinion on any issue, then dutifully argue with that opinion. Is there any sort of gene that can prevent them from doing that?

Ben said...

I'm willing to bet that in Marissa's case, a pair of Prada "genes" will contribute a little to a remedy.

Anonymous said...

This lights out thing must be in Cal's genes, because he always leaves lights on, and doors open, and toilet seats up, and he asks me my opinion just to argue as well. I think the other Jensen women would say the same about their men....anyone???

Marissa said...

I do not have a problem with leaving lights on, nor do I have a problem with accepting other's opinions. Now as I recall, women get a bad rep for bashing their husbands, but in the Jensen case it seems like hte men do the bashing. I love you Steve. See the nice things I post.

Marissa said...

Steve has a problem of starting rumors. I AM NOT PREGNANT.

Anonymous said...

I just thought everyone would want Matt's new cell number on this sight as well.801-678-6900

Anonymous said...

Inspiring Comment Kevin! Thanks.

Anonymous said...

I can verify the fact that Cal leaves the toilet seat up. He is however handy to have around when the snowmobile breaks down or something needs put together. Kevin was definitely has a gene deficiiency there, but makes up for it in other ways.

Anonymous said...

The only gene my husband seems to be missing is the one that allows you to change dirty diapers. Oh yeah, and the one that allows you to properly and safely unload a bike off a truck.

Anonymous said...

Just so you all know, History Channel is having a special on Genghis Khan... should be a good one.

Laura said...

Well I do feel like I have a little expertise in this area as I have now had two husbands to make "scientific observations" on. That combined with formal study at the most respected universities it actually has more to due with who pays the electric bill and exactly whose cash is going down the drain. One observation that I have made is if you carefully examine and compare the structure of the XX (female) and XY (male) chromosomes is is apparent that the Y chromosome is completely missing a fourth leg which contains the "I actually am always right" part of the gene" just food for thought. (Oh Matt thanks for the phone number, we have been looking every where for that.)

Anonymous said...

You all make me laugh. I am glad that Ben let me know about his Blog site. Great entertainment for a stay at home mom. By the way, I will completely admit to having the "leave the lights on" gene. It drives Nate crazy!